Tag Archive for collusion

Special Counsel Robert Mueller Spotted On Actual Fishing Expedition

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Key West, FL—Saturday afternoon a picture of Special Counsel Robert Mueller surfaced on Facebook. The picture depicts Mueller kicking back on a fishing boat with a check-in pin that suggests the image was taken in Key West, Florida. Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) said, “Come on! I don’t care how much he likes fishing, he had to know how bad the optics would look! So who took the picture, Comey or McCabe? Did he tag them on FB? When did he fish, and what did he fish for? Let’s call this one Saltwater-gate.”

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Trump Threatens Fictional Russian Spy: “You Better Hope There’s No Pictures From Our ‘Date’, Natasha!”

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Tweet Tower—Known Russian spy and moose fraternizer, Natasha, is back in the news again today after the president directed a series of heated tweets at her. Natasha is believed to have ties to both to the Kremlin and all the Trump women. She is known to send Melania cryptic messages that many fear are either orders or quick family meal recipes. In addition, everyone in the Trump cabinet has met with Natasha several times for fifteen minute intervals, cash only. Half of team Trump is denying the meetings ever occurred, the ones who are admitting to such meetings are denying they talked about Russian spanktions.

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Four More Attendees Of Junior’s Controversial Meeting Leaked

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Tweet Tower—President Donald Trump continues to defend his son’s decision to attempt to collude with Russian officials in an effort to aid his campaign in the run up to the 2016 election. Trump maintains his position that “anyone would have taken that meeting”, but added, “especially from my gene pool.” The president is not at all concerned the list of meeting attendees now includes General Orlov of James Bond fame, Alex Krycek from the X-files, Ivan Vanko from Iron Man 2, and that Russian boxer dude who fought Rocky in the late seventies. Confusing references a bit, Boris and Natasha are strongly denying that Rocky the flying squirrel was in attendance. “That is a load of Bullwinkle,” said Boris.

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