Heaven—God is reportedly “furious” with Senator Ted Cruz’s recent political antics. As Cruz delivered a speech on the virtues of clean Tar Sands earlier today, God disrupted the proceedings with a blinding flash of Photoshopped light. God then commanded: “Thou shalt retire from politics indefinitely!” The almighty later told reporters he was not impressed with the Texas Senator’s recent debate performance or his fantasy football picks. God then sent an official Notice of Tablet to Cruz Headquarters, certified mail, within the required time frames.
Tag Archive for funny
Pope In Sabbath Shirt Faked: This Discord Image Proven Real!
by Mr. Sherman •
Yogi Berra, Best Known For His Antics In Jellystone Park, Is Dead At 90
by Mr. Sherman •
Ineptotism: The Acorn Doesn’t Fall Far From The Bush
by Mick Zano •
After Greg Sent Zano Funny Image This Is What Happened
by Mick Zano •
Putin Explains Involvement in Syria: “I’m Just Getting In Some Target Practice”
by Mick Zano •
Damascus, SY—The global community is questioning the motives and the implications of Russia’s increased military involvement in Syria. Russia and Syria have always had strong ties but now Russian President Vladimir Putin is building a military base in the heart of Damascus. When asked if there is more to Putin’s strategy than simply combating ISIS, Putin shrugged, “I have so few political adversaries left I haven’t kill—uh, beaten at the polls—that I’ve decided on a little Hunger Games, Moscow-style.”
After answering several questions Putin mounted his dragon stead, Ivan, and is headed to Syria for victims. When asked about the name Ivan, Putin said, “I have named him Ivan Drago. He was the boxer from Rocky II also known as Death From Above. Remember that? In the Russian version of this movie he knocks Rocky Balboa’s head clean off the top of his spine. It’s epic and a more accurate outcome.”
The Force Is Weak With This One
by Mr. Sherman •
Did Job Anyway: The Slideshow
by Mr. Sherman •
And Now To Piss Off Liberals & Conservatives Alike
by Mr. Sherman •
GOP Determined To Win in 2016: Minus Women, Minorities, Gays, or Valid Points
by Mick Zano •
The GOP is a political party like Spinal Tap is a rock band. Hey, and now their crazies really do go to 11. But how about that feisty Fiorina performance, eh? I have to give her some credit but, amidst that Reagan love-fest, frankly anyone could have done that to her hair. But was that supposed to be a debate? Frodo got the One Ring to Mount Doom faster than that monstrosity. Yikes. Why do you need three hours to discuss nothing? …Seinfeld managed that in a half an hour each week. Still, I am sure this will go down in the annals of history next to Hitchens V Galloway, Socrates V Glaucon, or even Palin V Cleese during the Argument sketch. No it won’t. Yes it will. Quiet you!