Bohemian Monarchy?
Tag Archive for satire
Angus Young Finally Graduates High School: He’s Being Asked To Return His School Uniform
by Mick Zano •
Sydney, AU—The lead guitarist for the popular Australian rock band AC/DC, Angus Young, is back in the news today. The rock legend is finally receiving his high school diploma from Ashfield Boys High School Academy in Sydney, Australia. Young has attended the school on and off since 1976 and has now met all of his high school equivalency credits. The snafu with this achievement came in the form of a letter from the headmaster, demanding Angus return his official high school uniform by the end of the school day.
Assimilation And Cultural Identity Or Quien Cojones Eres?
by Pokey McDooris •
I commend you on delivering an admirable response to my immigration article, Zano, but there’s still one unacknowledged point of contention that is at the heart of my argument. You’ve been dancing around this point since our very first debate, and I am determined to pin you down, you slippery sophist. The main point behind virtually every one of my Discord articles is the question: what is our nation’s cultural identity? And, no, I don’t believe it is relevant or appropriate to explain our cultural identity as it relates to the subject of midget porn.Pope Feels The Bern! Details Emerge Of Sander’s Five Minutes With His Holiness
by Mr. Sherman •
RNC Offers Trump An Alternative Role: Prime Minister Of Iraq
by Mick Zano •
The Grand Old Party has a different approach to harness the power of The Donald. During a recent phone conversation, RNC Chair, Reince Priebus, offered Trump a “more suitable position for his talents.” Mr. Priebus told the press today, “Iraq needs a strong man and the Republican party needs an electable one.” When asked how he convinced Mr. Trump to accept this new role, Priebus said, “I told him, think of all the global respect you’ll gain by forcing Mexicans to build a wall along the Syrian border. And then I said, hey, maybe casinos aren’t big in ISIS controlled territory because no one has tried them there yet.”
Clinton Downplaying Pending Presidential Pantsuit Shortage
by Mick Zano •
Immigration Reform? Let’s Deport Every Republican Politician
by Mick Zano •
I got it! Let’s keep the “illegals” and load Congress onto buses. How about that for comprehensive immigration reform? I can see it now, Louis Armstrong singing What A Wonderful World, a chirping cartoon bird landing on your shoulder, a bill some day passing Congress. Think about it, a line of buses heading south with all those do-nothing politicians. Eleven million deportations isn’t possible, nor ethical, but 247 politicians? Think of the money the tax payers could save! It’s kind of what will happen to The GOP in the near future anyway, so I just want to hasten the process. And don’t worry, Pokey, they can all be short ones.
From Crappiness to Happiness in Three Easy Steps
by Alex Bone •
Collapsing Shack, AZ—Most of us have our mental health ups and downs, or as I prefer to call them: 1. drinking or 2. working. Some people certainly have a leg up on the happiness scale. What advantages do they have that I’m missing, besides talent and a life? Between dumpster diving and jamming out to old punk tunes in the dirt, I have discovered what these other Americans have going for them and where I may be lacking. After almost thirty minutes of effort, I have outlined a method to improve one’s happiness. I don’t think it will help me, I am too far gone, but perhaps you, gentle reader, will gain something from all of my hard work …or at least come to appreciate how you’re not as bad off as the old Bone Man.
The Ghost Dog Of Historic Brewing Company: Part 1
by Mr. Sherman •
Join team Search Truth Quest for one of their most controversial ghost hunts to date …but you shouldn’t date them.
Comprehensive Immigration Reform For Demies
by Pokey McDooris •
As our nation’s orthodox consciousness becomes corroded by Progressivism, words lose their meaning. Most Republicans are also falling into this senselessness. One perfect example is immigration reform. Democrats tell us that our immigration is “broken,” and therefore we need “comprehensive immigration reform.” On the surface, there’s some truth in that. Look Zano, I don’t disagree with your view of the state of our politics, my concern is in our ability to meaningfully engage on issues of concern. You are to “meaningful political discourse” as The Ghetto Shaman is to spiritual enlightenment. Bloghisattva?