The head of the NRA, Wayne LaPierre, said, “The loaded gun, placed in that toy aisle after a pro-gun activist photo shoot, was on the second shelf…fairly high on the 2nd shelf, I might add. The weapon, a beauty by the way, was situated above the Fisher Price toys, precisely the age group we hope to start marketing to…well, once we get a few more like-minded Supreme Court Justices on the bench. Meanwhile, I am grateful Arizona is out in front on this issue. I am happy to say Arizona will continue to arm their 5-8 year olds.”
When asked what he thought about arming children who suffer from conduct, impulse or autistic disorders, LaPierre said, “Excellent point. This is precisely why we need to stay ahead of this problem. We need to keep normal republican children packing some serious heat. If we hadn’t sufficiently armed our children, the FAO Schwarz shootings and the Toys ‘R’ Us rampage would have been much, much worse. In order to save lives we need to gun down those irresponsible toddlers as fast as possible.”
