Faber College, PA. BA in Philosophy with a minor in Claymation Pornography.

Two time NCBA National Boxing Champion.

Studied T’ai Chi Ch’aun with Mantak Chia (not pet, just Chia).

Studied the ancient texts of Chang Li Ching, Yang Lu Chan, Lao Tze Lay, and I read Wilber’s A Brief History of Everything, twice (mostly sober).

EMPLOYMENT:

(1998-2008) worked with the most ruthless, aggressive, and volatile people in the world (other than Discord staff). I am best described as a social servant to the diagnose’m and medicate’m field of mental health. Enforced behavior plans in our public schools (mostly sober).

POET/GENIUS:

I’ve published a novel, and a controversial collection of limericks written on bar napkins. I’m a regular contributor to the Daily Discord where together we are sarcastically salving society.

CULTURAL FACILITATOR (ie. Town jackass):

I’ve developed a Barroom Constitution and written the compendium: Articles of Degeneration. I’ve been ejected from 21 bars, coffee shops, or diners (7 constitutionally viable and 14 unconstitutional). I’ve defended myself in 3 court hearings (won 2, lost 1). I’ve observed my brother defend himself in 10 court hearings (won 7, lost 3). I watched Judge Judy this week (in its entirety). I’ve studied the principles of logic and the logic of principles, and I challenge you to a game of chess (preferably naked).