Topeka, KS—Congressman Stanley Farrell (R) was reportedly very angry with allegations that the Tea Party played a key role in the stock market’s recent turbulence.  People who knew him, described him as prone to political fits and tirades.  He often barked about wanting a smaller government and lower taxes.

“He’s been just furious with President Obama’s liberal agenda,” said his wife Megan.  “Last week he got much worse.  He was frothing at the mouth and chasing cars around that have progressive bumper stickers.”

ASPCA workers claim he was angry, and it was hard to make sense of his anger.

“He left us no choice,” said Rin Tim Tim of the ASPCA.  “We did not have any clue he was a Congressman at the time of the lethal injection…or even a human for that matter.” 

The ASPCA President told Discord reporters he has no remorse.

“Look, if another furry politician comes into one of our locations and starts biting people and accusing them of being socialist-illegals, we’re going to do the same damn thing.”